Category Archives: New York

Livin The Dream?

This week’s Dustinland comic is basically a combination of all the discussions I’ve been having in the real world. I moved to the burbs about 5 months ago and so now everyone wants to hear my take on it. It’s like when you get married or have kids or get back from a big vacation. Everyone asks you the same things—for good reason. But it does get tiring having the same conversation over and over again. Although there are some subtle nuances that can be more interesting if you really dig into them. Like seeing skunks and fearing ticks. That’s when I enjoy the conversation more.

And man, I really did see a skunk this weekend, crossing the street in front of my house. A skunk! I live 40 minutes from NYC! Later I showed my kid a picture of a skunk and told him, hey, if you ever see this animal, STAY AWAY. And then a neighbor told me, oh boy, coming out in broad daylight, could be a rabid skunk. Man, that’s not cool. Skunks are bad enough. Now it’s a rabid skunk!

But yeah, I do like it out here.

Commuted

This week’s Dustinland comic is my first since moving to a house in Westchester, and my last before the stupid U.S. election. I decided to spare you more political nonsense and just threw you something lighthearted about my new place in the world. And yes, it’s been two weeks since my last update. Very unusual. Aside from vacations and work trips, I have updated my site with a new comic once a week since 2000. So as you can imagine, I’ve been busy. Man, moving SUCKS. Glad I’m finally here. It’s pretty great. And yeah, the comic thing, I do feel like that but only sometimes. Like when I sit on the back of the train where all the midtown finance guys sit. The front is way chiller.

Meet The Mets Fan

Man, as I said in this week’s Dustinland, I really thought the Mets had it this year. After a shitty first half they had such an amazing second half, ended on a bright note, then had a killer first two rounds of the postseason. Things were so magical — how did KC just stop us dead in our tracks?! I guess they had their own magic that beat ours. Kind of like a game of Magic The Gathering except not.

Man, losing all the time SUCKS. What a downer. I’m so tired of expecting to lose. I don’t know how Cubs fans deal with it. Or how Boston did. I guess that’s what made Boston’s first World Series in a zillion years so fulfilling. But I mean, I really don’t want to wait decades. I think since 1986 is more than enough. Especially in a town like NYC where there’s another team—one that wins every other year and spends twice what the Mets does, since they’re not bankrupt and we are. Damnit. I could go on all night but it’s too late. Stupid sports.

Ironic Hipster T-Shirts: Behind The Scenes

I’m back with a new Dustinland after a week off for my summer vacation, and this comic is about hipster T-shirts. Well, at the time they weren’t really hipster T-shirts. They were just cheap ass used shirts that were perfect for recent college graduates barely scraping by in NYC—or any other place really. This was back in the early 2000s before social media, so there actually were secrets that lasted for a little while. Today, forget it. If someone found a place to get cool anything for cheap it’ll be posted and shared to death within days and before you know it, bye bye. It’s ruined.

Thankfully these days I can afford to pay more than $2 for a shirt and I’m sort of at that point where I don’t wear tees to work, but I still think it’s sad that this isn’t even an option anymore for those who wish it was, if there are such people, which there may no longer be.

Merry Spitemas

The holiday season has officially begun, and I already picked out my Christmas tree, one week earlier than I normally do. And that’s what inspired this week’s Dustinland comic. The happiness generated by my new tree reminded me of the time way back, depressingly over a decade ago, when I bought my own secret private tree that I spitefully hid from my roommates. And don’t get me wrong, we were all on very good terms before and after that. I just got pissed off and reacted in the heat of the moment, and then decided to go with it as some sort of weird sort of funny lesson. I doubt anyone learned anything from it, besides me, and all I learned was how to put a Christmas tree using a crappy $5 metal base (it ain’t easy).

Anyway, I do love the holiday season. As I said in another comic a year or two ago, one nice thing about having kids is that it brings some fun back into the season. Sure, it’s always pretty and nice and cozy, and there’s that whole thing where there are actually several days when you don’t have to work, but overall, as you get older, it starts to lose its magic. But you become a parent and suddenly Santa is back in the picture and things are exciting again. See, there you go, some positivity, right after I bah humbugged and somehow manage to turn the act of buying a Christmas tree into something spiteful. Now that takes talent, no?

The NYC E Cig Ban

This week’s Dustinland comic was inspired by my buddy Russ. He’s an authority in vaping aka e-cigarettes. Basically the dude smoked for years and years and never was able to quit. Then e-cigs came along and boom, he’s done smoking. Sure, he still vapes all the time, but he feels great. Anyway, I recently heard that he’s supporting a lawsuit against the city claiming their soon to be enacted e cig ban is actually illegal, so I called him and asked what the deal was.

You can find out more about that from Russ’ podcast Click Bang! Me personally, I don’t smoke cigarettes. Never have. And I was so happy when they banned smoking from bars. But this… this just seems stupid. Here’s something that people are using to kick the habit, and we’re going to make it more difficult for them? Why? Well, that’s what the strip is about, so no need to get into it again here. But yeah. NYC. Come on. Bloomberg is out. Enough with the nanny state thing.

People I See At The Supermarket

This week’s comic is pretty much what the title says it is: People I see at the supermarket—in Queens NYC. I have a feeling the supermarket experience is very different in most other parts of the country. For example, you can walk down an aisle and not be completely blocked by one solitary confused dumbass and their cart.  See, in NYC, space is expensive, so supermarkets have to jam everything into tiny cramped narrow aisles. And when you combine that with the lack of peripheral vision I referred to in my strip, well, lets just say you wind up retreating from 50% of the aisles.

To give you a quick behind the scenes on this strip, let me take you through the panels.

1: I really did hear people complaining about the excellent beer selection in my local supermarket. Not because they were teetotalers. They were looking for beer. There was just TOO MUCH. “Too much beer! It took me an entire 16 seconds of browsing before I found my case of Coors Light!!!” Andy Rooney would be proud.

2: I guess large assed ladies have the right to wear tights on such casual outings. It just seems… unusual that this is such a frequent sight. Maybe I’m looking too hard. I could be an ass man and not know it.

3. It’s always depressing how often a large, unhealthy and frankly dumb looking person has a cart full of processed garbage.

4. My wife said “maybe they’re stressed because they can’t read English. Think about how stressed you’d be trying to figure out diced or chopped just from the pictures.” Good point.

5. I have not given up! I still try to make it fun for my little guy at the store. But I do get it. Totally.

6. Yup. Just stand there. Don’t move. No one in here but you.