God’s Greatest Hits (and Misses)

This week’s Dustinland is either about God or about everything. If you believe in the existence of a God or multiple Gods who are responsible for creating everything, then it is kinda funny to think about how they made some awesome stuff that rules, as well as some stuff that really sucks. Either funny or frustrating and/or terrifying. And if you don’t believe there’s any sort of higher power that created the universe and all the stuff in it (spoons, grass, horses, whorses etc…), then it’s fun to think of this as the ultimate Top 10—and Bottom 10—list.

Some atheists also like to make fun of religious folks. That’s not something I want to get into here. Just the mere discussion about discussing it is too long and boring (Redditors, you know what I’m talking about here). So yeah, good times. Comics. Jokes.

PS If there is a God and he is not happy with this comic, I’m really, really, really sorry. Just let me know and I will atone in whatever way you wish. I guess it depends which religion is correct. I might have to sacrifice an animal, or maybe just say I’m sorry, or maybe not eat anything for a few days. Or someone might have to throw rocks at me until I die. I really hope that’s not the case. Maybe there’s just one God for all the religions and he (if God is a she there wouldn’t be so many aggro douche bags around) tolerates everyone being totally wrong since he’s just a cool guy who chills out on a cloud. Okay I’ll stop now.

10 responses to “God’s Greatest Hits (and Misses)

  1. Bitter Scribe

    As far as I’m concerned, God’s biggest miss was the legions of idiots all throughout history who have committed unfathomable violence and savagery in His name.

  2. tomfisher123@aol.com

    I want a twisty straw, that’s in the e-mail for certain people who don’t read it yet get to win Dustin’s competition.

    Seriously Facebook Dustin ? that has got to be a breach of my human rights not being able to enter your competition.

    Yeah mosquitos suck apparently they have killed half the people who have ever lived. Though god munchers will probably say you just understand God’s plan.

    I believe Buddha at least initially never mentioned God in any of his teachings. It’s always men though isn’t it, I think it’s time we moved back to women spiritual leaders and gods. There will be more boobies on tv that way.

    • Sorry you couldn’t enter the contest without Facebook. That just seems to be what all the crazy kids are doing these days. But don’t worry — next time I’ll figure out a way everyone can do it. You may have to wait another 10 years though. But hell if you’re still a fan by then you should win something no matter what.

  3. Crazy pah they aint the crazy kids they are the sheep. I’m crazy my philosophy of life is what’s crazy today is dull tomorrow, what’s really crazy today is really really crazy tomorrow so be really crazy.

  4. I’d add PMS, menstrual cramps, and 5 days of uncontrollable bleeding from your crotch… every month… for 35 years to the lust of God’s misses! And being told you’re inherently inferior, dumber, and less competent too! Ah, life sucks.

  5. Hey dude! One thing about mosquitoes. I am a biologist, so I know a little bit more about ’em. Male mosquitoes, who are not small vampires and don’t drink blood, eat nectar and are not just useful, but rather irreplaceable in ecosystem, as they spread pollen. No mosquitoes = no (shitload of) many number of plant species = disaster for herbivores = disaster for carnivores = ecosystem goes to shit. Same thing goes for bees. And those fuckers sting too, but often kill, allergic people.
    Greetings from country where you got the most attention! (you know what is it ;D)

    • No way! Non-blood-drinking mosquitos! I had no idea. Well, I guess that makes sense then. Everything plays its part in some way, even the most annoying creatures. I don’t even want to know what good thing roaches do. Or bedbugs. Yeah… bedbugs. Come on, those must be all bad right?

  6. Btw on God thing: I don’t think there is a God, I think this whole “thing” is just a huge computer simulation.

  7. Well, bedbugs are pure evil, but mosquitoes – are not! That what attacks you and drinks your blood like a drunkard taking bottle of Jack Daniels is female, she needs blood in order to feed her fertilized eggs. Male is much bigger, he drinks fruit juice (nectar), and spreads pollen. Fuck, it’s lame that we can’t live without those lil’ bastards. You wanna eat some delicious fruit? Quince, pear, maybe even apple (or like thousand more plants)? Hey, it’s most probably pollened by male mosquito… So, why didn’t females adapted to drink nectar like males? (answer is most likely precious iron in blood, but there are more unanswered questions)
    In any case, I heard that USA has bedbug invasion here and there…weird, you’re much more developed than we are, and there are no known no infestations in like, decades! How that happened? We are in shit, we have to have bedbugs, not USA 😐

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