Monthly Archives: January 2010

Bad Will Hunting

Don’t know how much more there is to say about this week’s Dustinland. I think I covered most of my feelings on hunting in there. It’s weird. For a liberal like me, there’s that initial instinct to say, hey, killing animals for pleasure is sick and unfair. But unless you’re a vegetarian or eating nothing but organic, free-range animals, you’d be a hypocrite to tell a hunter he’s mistreating animals. I can also imagine that hunting can be fun. Being outdoors, silently stalking your prey, at one with nature, basically getting back to your animal roots. I mean, hell, some people hunt with bows. That’s just ill right there.

But you know, I just don’t really feel like killing things. Maybe if I was going to eat it. I just would feel bad if I had to finish it off close range.

P.S. Also bad: killing cool endangered animals.

Relief Effort

This week featured two Dustinlands, and this one was a MLK Day special. Of course, MLK would not approve of the violent solution carried out by his image, so I do apologize for that. And you know, I struggle with the idea of ever suggesting a violent solution to any problem, but sometimes you just want to voice your feelings in a provocative way. Oh, and in case you don’t know what I’m referring to in this strip, in the wake of the earthquake in Haiti, fat gasbag Rush Limbaugh said people shouldn’t donate money to the Red Cross via the Whitehouse website because Obama might steal it, or something to that effect. Additionally, rotting evil incarnate Pat Roberston suggested that Haiti deserved the earthquake because back in the day they made a deal with a devil to free their nation from France.

So you know, I mean, it does seem like these guys deserve to have their heads exploded. I guess morally that would be wrong, so I’ll just for the record say that I would not be happy if this actually occurred. But I would have to try to not be happy, if you know what I mean.

Lastly, I would like to thank Simon Bisley for teaching me to draw bloody gore via his illustrations in an awesomely violent comic called Lobo.

Stupid Is As Stupid Does — Jersey Shore

Hey, I admitted it in this week’s Dustinland, it’s hard to not enjoy Jersey Shore. It’s just entertaining. But it’s also sad. MTV has basically become the “Watch Our Youth And Despair” channel. It’s all just so depressing. Everywhere you look, idiots — and not just unfortunate idiots. Idiots that are proud of being ignorant. That’s the US for you these days. The land of the free, home of the dumb.

Avatar Birdys

This week’s Birdys (1220, 1221, 1222) were inspired by the movie Avatar. Now I know what you’re thinking: Dustin, oh infinite hater of all things, did you dislike the movie? Actually, no, I quite enjoyed it. My quick review: I will forgive the poor dialgoue, silly plot holes, and occasional bad acting, for it is all balanced out by the film’s incredible visual beauty (see it in 3D to have your mind blown) and its ultra liberal message (might as well have been written by Noam Chomsky). Well, for once something has lived up to the hype.

Love Song

This week’s Dustinland was, in its earliest form, going to be a sort of discussion about how lyrics in popular music have gotten just a wee bit more explicit as time has progressed, but I thought that was a pretty boring, obvious subject, at least if considered in the way it traditionally is. So here’s a little twist on the matter — one that’s hopefully more entertaining than it would have been in illustrated essay form, if you will.

Oh, and just in case you’re not getting this one: all the dialogue in this strip is from song lyrics.

Retourds

This Dustinland was inspired by my recent trip to Hawaii, which was incredibly awesome. Now, I don’t want to seem like a snobby douche — I realize that most of the people I would consider cheesy tourists have saved up and paid a lot of money for their vacations and are just trying to enjoy themselves, and good for them. However, it can often be painful to watch and listen to, and in this case, dangerous.

It’s one thing to leave Kansas for a vacation in New York only to wind up eating at Olive Garden, Sbarro’s and Bumba Gump Shrimp Co., but it’s another to travel to Waimea Bay and let your six-year-old run into the water where he can get washed away by a sudden giant wave in the flash of an eye, despite repeated warnings broadcast over loudspeakers by lifeguards. And that’s exactly what I was witness to, not once, but many times — at least once every ten minutes for two hours straight. See, there’s nothing wrong with wandering around Hawaii looking for a nice beach to swim at, but even the slightest bit of Googling will tell you that the North Shore of Oahu is famous for huge, dangerous surf, especially in the winter. Here are literally the first few sentences from the first entry found by Googling Waimea Bay Beach:

“During the summer months the water of this ‘Reddish’ bay is calm and great for swimming with a large sandy beach area. But watch out during the winter months when the waves can reach heights of thirty feet. This is the home of the largest, most dangerous and spectacular surf in the world.”

So I don’t think it’s too much to ask for your average tourist to do one minute of research before letting your child splash around in surf, risking his life, as well as that of the beach’s lifeguards.

In other news, I would just like to toot my own horn a little by pointing out the fantastic attention to detail in this week’s Dustinland. In fact, I made this week’s comic larger than the usual Dustinland just so that you wouldn’t miss a thing. Notice the pale color of the tourist’s pasty skin, as well as the pink sunburn on the large tourist mama. Take note of the changing pattern in the tourist papa’s obnoxious shirt: palm trees, sport fish, flowers, then in the final panel, pineapples. Observe the matching Crocs on mama and child. What does all this mean? It means that yes, I have been to Honolulu.