What If: The American Revolution Took Place Today

You may be saying, hey, why is there a colon in the title of this week’s Dustinland? Well, Marvel Comics used to have these What If issues, like, What If: Peter Parker Was Bitten By a Radioactive Horse Instead of a Spider? So yeah, there’s that.

As for the idea, well, I think we’re all a bunch of lazy fuckers. Sure, we may be educated. Sure, we know what’s going on — some of us at least. And we have opinions. Oh yeah we all have big opinions on what’s wrong these days. I mean, the outrage is just over-flowing. Things have got to change now!!! Oh, wait, I have to do something? Hmmm.. well I went to that protest back in 2002, doesn’t that count? And I voted. So, like, now I kinda just wanna live my life. I’m busy. I work all day, I go home and have to make dinner and clean things and relax. Is there really time for politics? Sure, I could watch other people engage in politics on TV, but I just really don’t have the energy to go out into the world and make a difference personally. But hell, you send me a link and I will fucking sign the shit out of that email petition! Man, I might even donate $10 to some cause or somethin.

Now that I got that out of my system, I can seriously say that I’m talking about myself here as much as I’m talking about others. I just got this email from Michael Moore’s list, and there are all these suggestions for how to get involved and man, I just really don’t feel like going down to the local Democratic Party office and taking over a meeting. But I know I should. I should do something. I want to. I just don’t know what. Or when. Man, it’s so hard to care about the world and not feel like a hypocrite sometimes if you’re not out there in the Peace Core or volunteering for Dennis Kucinich.

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5 responses to “What If: The American Revolution Took Place Today

  1. I particularly enjoy that you explained the colon.

  2. Well IIRC most of those involved at the top of the Revolution were generally well to-do. Kind of have a good deal of time to plan for these things when you do not have to worry about working and cleaning and taking care of life.

    So my suggestion is we all become rich and hire illegal immigrants to take care of things. Then we can have a new Revolution and fix everything.

    We’ll just do what they did in the old days, promise the poor people that if they fight and help us win they’ll get plenty of goodies.

    I know that’s the first thing I’d do when I’m rich. Right after spending some times flying to islands on my private jet.

  3. Agreed, Paul – some of us have too many distractions in our own little worlds to get too passionate about politics.

    People are probably a little jaded too. I view grassroots movements as being largely ineffective in the US after seeing how so much of politics is controlled by the powerful few. Outcomes are already determined before most people even get an idea of what’s going on, or know about an issue.

    Also, we’re pretty comfortable here in the US. We get outraged at things on a philosophical level, but in other countries the threats are more visceral. I’d do more than sign an email petition of there were Islamic rebels hiding in the mountains of West Virgina and fighting the US army, or if there was the equivalent of the Tamil Tigers fighting here.

    Maybe it’s easier to get motivated if it’s an “us v. outsiders” situation in our own country, like the Americans v. the British during the revolution.

  4. I’ve been thinking about this more, and while meditating to a soundtrack by Panetra last night I realized how the lines between news and entertainment, and between criminals and celebrities are often blurred today. To me, this means that real news events that affect our lives aren’t processed or understood in that way – we view these events as having the same impact and effect on us as, say, the release of a new movie of a when a new CD “drops.” And correspondingly, our reactions are tempered.

    I was shocked by a headline on today’s wsj.com site about the Fort Hood “alleged” mass murderer Nidal Hasan. The WSJ describes him as “A Helper With Worries of His Own.” A “helper”??? He’s not a helper!! He’s a traitor and mass murderer. We also don’t need to get to know this guy, to guy inside his head, and find out about his home life in Virginia, or find out about his own “anxieties.” Gather evidence about the incident, convict him, and fry him. Texas was the wrong place for that “good American” to go on a shooting rampage.

    But yeah, great comic, as usual.

  5. Well I agree about the frying part, but we should probably look into the details of his life, not to sympathize with him, but to gather information that can hopefully prevent future incidents.

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